Is it okay to have non-Muslims friends? How do we balance between religious duties and their non-Islamic lifestyle?

I’m glad you approached us with a question about friendship. During our youth, friendship plays a crucial role in personality development and formation. During teenage years and through college or university, people usually spend more time outside the home with friends and even if online, connect with friends on Facebook and chat. That is why the activities, lifestyle, attitude and values of your friends is so important - because you will be influenced by them. When you hang out with people who play basketball it may cross your mind at least once to give it a shot, even if you originally hated it or weren’t interested in it. This inclination may also apply to other, (perhaps harmful) activities.

Having said that, the short answer to your question is, yes, it is okay to have non-Muslim friends. Keep in mind that although it is not wrong to have non-Muslim friends there are certain lines that you shouldn’t cross with any friend, regardless of their religious beliefs. This line should be drawn on things that are forbidden in Islam, things that adversely effect your schooling or your health and harmful relationships. So as long as your friends don’t influence you or encourage you to do such things (and really what type of friends would they be if they did?) you can be their friend.

Other people your age that are Jewish, Christian, or Buddhist, for example (especially if they are serious about their religion and values) are also picky about who they keep as close friends and how they spend their time. They too are looking for friends to have a good time with, but without crossing those lines I mentioned earlier, just to mindlessly 'fit in'. Keeping this in mind I would encourage you to get close to people who respect who you are, help you when needed and in helping you work towards a positive future. In addition to this, since you will need some friends that will motivate you, help you and even inspire you with Islam, make sure that a chunk of your good friends are Muslims who share your beliefs and concerns.

Good luck! May Allah help you.

Omar Sallam holds a Bachelors in Social Services and works with YMCA's Newcomer Centre in Hamilton. He is studying to become a professional counsellor.